You might ask if we have given up on having biological children? No, not necessarily, we still believe we have an amazing God who can do anything and he may one day allow that to happen. But right now we feel very blessed to be called to adoption and we know God has an amazing plan for us!
I started looking over all of the paperwork we have coming up in our future last night and it is all very over whelming so please pray that we don't get stressed about this. We want this to be a wonderful time to look back on, even despite all the paperwork! I will try to go over what the next weeks and months will look like as we proceed for those of you that would like to know this... Yesterday we signed up with Christian Adoption Consultants "CAC" (turned in our application, client agreement and "form of payment")- they are not an adoption agency, but they work with multiple adoption agencies. They will put together our "family profile" for us (after we answer a long list of profile questions which thankfully we have already done and compile a TON of pictures for them to use- still working on that), they will help us get through all the paperwork, provide us with information on adoption loans and grants, and just help educate us about the whole process. They also help you find an agency to do your home study which is where the majority of our time will go- to the home study paperwork! We will be using an agency that is affiliated with CAC called Hope for Adoption. They are an adoption agency (one of the ones we will work with) and also do home studies. We will also need to apply to them and turn in our "form of payment". So, after we turn in our profile questions and pictures (printed and in CD format) to our CAC consultant we can start on the home study paperwork, which is A LOT. Maybe one day I will post what all it consists of. The home study agency also meets with you 3 times during the process and of course, there is an in home evaluation too. So, we also have several "home improvement" projects that need to get done pretty soon :) After we finish our home study and are approved (which will likely take several months or more I am guessing) we can start applying to the 4 adoption agencies CAC works with (each has their own application and list of requirements, including receiving a copy of our home study and copies of our family profile). Once approved by each of them, which I assume will not be an issue, we start waiting for what they call "situations". These are referrals to a birth mother who is expecting (anywhere from right away to 8/9 months out). When we get a referral it means the birth mother has already looked at our family profile and likes us, so then we get to review what information is available about her and her "situation" and decide if we feel that is the child for us. It all sounds very weird. Since most adoptions are "semi open" these days we would get to talk to the birth mother on the phone and make a decision from there. She is choosing a forever family for her child and we have to feel at peace about the mother and her situation also. There is a very wide variety of "situations" out there- birth mothers that are teenagers, birth mothers who already have children and don't want anymore, birth mothers that are married and the couple doesn't want kids after getting pregnant (amazing I know but they are out there). Some birth mothers have used drugs during some or even all of their pregnancy, and some need, or just want, of all of their living and medical expenses paid during the pregnancy (yes, this is often part of the deal, so depending on how far along the mother is or isn't it can make a difference as to how much the adoption total is). But once we are "matched" with a birth mother and have decided it is the right match for us we can have contact with the mother until she gives birth (on a private phone line or pre-paid cell so she doesn't have our real phone number or know where we live). The amount of contact is really up to her though- some want to talk with you and some really don't. Some birth mothers request the adoptive parents to be in the delivery room when she gives birth if at all possible and in other situations you would either see the baby right after she gives birth or shortly there after. (There are a few states that differ on this though- not sure about all that yet). CAC tries to work with states that favor the adoptive parents as to when the birth mothers rights are officially revoked. In some states her rights are revoked as soon as she signs in others she may have any where from 1-10 days to change her mind and take the child back. So, CAC tries to work with states who have little "waiting time" (Georgia is not one of the better ones). Our child will most likely be born in another state and we will travel to get him/her (there is however a fairly lengthy waiting time due to paperwork before you can bring the child back to your state- lots of legal stuff- so we could be gone a minimum of a week. And lastly, there is a waiting time before the adoption is considered "final"- this can vary but you have to be followed-up with your caseworker/social worker once you get back home to make sure everything is going well. This is all just my understanding of the process so far, as best as I can explain it, which might not be that well- sorry! But we will continue to post as the process goes along.
So, please pray for us as we start this amazing journey that God will give us clear guidance each step of the way and that He will provide financially for this very expensive journey (best guess of cost would be $30,000-$40,000 total when its all said and done). Pray that in each decision we have to make along the way, especially when it comes down to choosing a birth mother/child, that God would give us a perfect peace of which way to proceed. Pray that we would have no "heart aches" along the way (some birth mothers do change their mind before they give birth- after choosing a family- and I pray we never have to experience that). Please pray for us however the Lord leads you! We can't wait to share this amazing journey with our family and friends! Thanks to everyone taking the time to read this!
