The Call to Adopt

In my mind it seems like I have always felt called to adopt. I can remember back as far as middle and high school when I thought I would want to adopt one day. As Ephesians 1:3-10 so wonderfully puts and I will sum up very simply: we are so blessed that God has adopted us as his sons through Jesus Christ! I recently came across these verses and even though it is not directly talking about the adoption of children it spoke to me. If Christ can adopt us as the sinners we are, why shouldn't we adopt? Jarrod and I talked about adoption a little bit when we first got married and it was something we both thought we might want to do one day (I'm sure at that time in my mind I was thinking years away after we had biological children). However, God has recently started bringing things and people into our lives that started us thinking about adoption. Some good friends of ours (the Kotrlas) are currently in the process of adopting two children from Ethiopia (they are currently waiting on a referral) and we are so excited for their journey! Their passion for this has really spoken to and blessed me. At work, I have recently talked on the phone with several people about to bring an adopted child home and the joy in their voices has made my passion for adoption grow. My mom made contact with some friends of her and my dad who adopted a little girl through domestic infant adoption a couple years ago and we started looking into the adoption consultants that they used (Christian Adoption Consultants). I have been so blessed by the many adoption stories and blogs their website has linked me to. There have been other little things along the way but one that sticks out to both of us is several Sundays ago at church (Four Corners Church), our pastor and good friend, Alex Early, was doing announcements and started talking about some ways we could help others and at the very end he said "oh, and adopt!" It was so loud and clear to me and later talking to Jarrod it spoke to him to. We don't know that Alex was speaking directly to us in saying that, but I think God used him to speak to us. So, along with all this we have been praying together and apart regarding adoption and how this looks for us and that this would be something we are doing because God has called us to and not something we are just doing because we want a child. Of course, we do want children but adoption is such a HUGE journey so we want to make sure that this is the journey God wants us on and we want to follow in his steps the whole way. And there are so many choices along the way and so many risks, so we want all of those to be in God's hands. But, right now we do feel we are called to adopt and are currently looking into working with Christian Adoption Consultants to help guide us through the process and link us with multiple adoption agencies. We will be meeting with the friends of my family (the Kesslers) this coming Saturday to talk to them about their adoption journey and hopefully get a clearer picture of what will/can happen. We are so excited to start this journey, Lord willing, and can't to share with family and friends who may read this.

Among all of this we have a follow up appointment with my Reproductive Endocrinologist on July 13th to discuss all of our test results so far and see what the next step would be to try and get pregnant. We are not sure how far we want to go in that process as so much of that seems like you are taking control out of God's hands but we will go hear what she has to say and continue to pray for God's guidance in that process. We just don't know and that is ok! Because we are trusting that God will put us exactly where he wants us and lead us down the path he wants us on. But please pray for us on both of these issues that God would be 100% in control and we would have a peace about each decision we make along the way.

First Post and hopefully not the last...

So, We're not exactly sure how to start this- neither of us have ever "blogged" before but we are going to make an attempt as we venture into this new phase of our life. Thought I would start with some history of the past several years so everyone will know how we got to where we are now. Jarrod and I got married almost 6 years ago (6 years July 2010). We always knew we wanted kids but wanted to wait a few years before trying (in hindsight we wish we had not waited so long). So, in the late fall of 2008 we stopped "preventing pregnancy". I guess I had just always thought (a little naively) that I would just get pregnant not too long after trying, Well, I guess that was sort of true as I did get pregnant in May of 2009. Unfortunately, in July we lost the baby- doctor called it a "blighted ovum". This was a very difficult thing for both of us and is still a very sad part of our life. But we are so fortunate to have the amazing love of Jesus in our lives who helped to comfort us and also amazing friends and family who were there for us when we were ready to talk about it. In September of 2009 I decided to go see a new OBGYN at the recommendation of a friend who is all too familiar with what I had gone through. My new doctor was/is wonderful and she immediately started running a lot of bloodwork and did a transvaginal ultrasound. My bloodwork at the time was determined to be normal but the ultrasound showed some fluid in my uterus so she later performed an endometrial biopsy (very painful and not something I ever wanted to do again...). The results of the biopsy showed I had endometritis which is easily treated with a certain antibiotic. I finished my antibiotic and my follow-up ultrasound showed no fluid. So, we proceeded to "keep trying". In April 2010 (still not pregnant again) I went for my yearly GYN appointment and she went ahead and ordered some more bloodwork to recheck some things, specifically my thyroid since I have a family history of thyroid issues and autoimmune issues. She called me a couple weeks later in May and said my TSH had come back pretty high so she declared me hypothyroid and I started on levothyroxine the next morning. My mom and dad are both hypothyroid- my mom has Hashimotos/AutoImmune Thyroiditis so there was a concern that I might have this too. My doctor said I needed to make an appointment with an endocrinologist. I had actually decided after my yearly appointment in April to go ahead and make an appointment with a Reproductive Endocrinologist (they specialize in infertility) so I already had that coming up in 3 weeks. So, on June 2nd I had my first appointment with my Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE from here on out). She reviewed all of my history and ordered more bloodwork and several procedures. So, I had bloodwork done that day, including a repeat of my TSH level. On June 8th I had a HSG xray done (where they inject dye into your uterus and fallopian tubes and take xrays to make sure all is working properly and the shape of your uterus is normal). This procedure was again very painful. Sometime that week I also got back my bloodwork results which showed my TSH had dropped really low and I needed to decrease the strength of my thyroid medicine. It also showed that my hypothyroidism was autoimmune related and indeed I had Hashimotos like my mom (wasn't that nice of her to share with me, haha). This has been shown to cause problems with infertility and/or miscarriage. On June 21st I went in for more bloodwork (specifically progesterone and repeat TSH) and Jarrod went in for his "evaluation" (we'll leave his part at that). Found out later that week that my progesterone was low and my doctor later said it looked like I did not ovulate and also that Jarrod had "fertility" issues also. But atleast my TSH was coming back up closer to where they want it to be. On June 25th I went in to have another endometrial biopsy (you know, the one I said last Fall I would never do again...). This time I asked for something stronger than Advil and they gave me some Percocet to take- yay! Well, it might have helped some but it was still pretty painful. So, our RE doctor pretty much told us that day we have a lot of "issues" going on that could be preventing us from getting pregnant and may continue to do so. We are scheduled for a follow-up on July 13th to discuss all of this and talk about the next steps. We don't know what those are really but we are trusting that God has a wonderful plan for us and He knows just what he is doing. But still it is very hard to not be able to have a child when all your friends around you have or are and when all you have dreamed of being since you were a little girl is a mom. One day...

OK, so by now some of you who have read the "about me" section are asking where adoption plays into all of this- well it does, but I will have to continue that part tomorrow as it is now past my bedtime. Didn't realize how long it would take to type this first part!